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Never Been to the OBGYN? Beginner’s Guide

By: Trisha Hoang and Michelle Barragan



Many people feel nervous or even scared about visiting an OBGYN for the first time. The most common concerns people have about a gynecologist appointment are along the lines of painful examinations, feeling judged by their doctor, or finding something terribly “wrong”. This blog’s purpose is to alleviate these fears and provide credible information on OBGYN visits so that you know what to expect going in and ultimately can take care of your health without anxiety!

First, it’s important to know what an OBGYN does exactly and why it is important to see an OBGYN rather than your regular physician. An obstetrician/gynecologist, or OB/GYN, specializes in the treatment of conditions relating to reproductive health, breast disease and gynecologic cancers, and family planning. Going to an OBGYN for problems relating to those listed could be much more helpful than going to a general physician or family physician, who may not be as specialized in these areas.

An OBGYN is knowledgeable in health topics that tend to be stigmatized in society, such as menstrual periods, STDs, sex, birth control, and pregnancy. It’s completely normal to feel anxious and embarrassed about having to be vulnerable in front of someone about these more personal issues — but since this is their field of expertise, OBGYNs have had countless experiences with a variety of patients’ issues. This means that they are a safe space for you to freely discuss your concerns. This is so vital because these concerns affect your daily life and mental and physical health.

Talking to an OBGYN about your specific health concerns and doing annual visits is incredibly important to catch any complications before they grow further. For example, it is statistically more difficult for individuals with vaginas to spot symptoms of genital diseases than for those with penises, which is why consistent check ups with an OBGYN are helpful to counteract these statistics. One study showed that women who go to the emergency room for symptoms of internal pain are less likely to get pain medication and are more often dismissed. Going to the OBGYN would lessen the likelihood of not being taken seriously by medical professionals. This is because an OBGYN is more likely to have encountered similar cases and also are more likely to listen to patients’ specific concerns.

It is recommended you make your first OBGYN appointment between the ages 13 to 15 years old, but don’t feel worried if you are above this age range! It is never too late to start your OBGYN visits and there is no shame or judgment in taking care of your health. With the first appointment, no matter what age, your gynecologist should walk you through the visit and ask a lot of questions to assess and to better understand you as a new patient.

If you are a teen coming with a parent/guardian to the appointment, you do not have to be concerned about having them in the room. Your gynecologist will ask them to wait outside while asking you questions. However, if you do feel more comfortable with your parent/guardian or even a friend in the room, let your gynecologist know. While your gynecologist may encourage you to have conversations with your parent/guardian about health concerns, all information you share with your gynecologist will be kept confidential.


Some examples of questions you could be asked are:

When was your first period?

When was the last time you had your period?

Are you sexually active? If so, what birth control method(s) are you using?

Do you have painful menstrual cramps?

Do you or anyone in your immediate family have any significant medical history? (i.e. diabetes, cancer, etc.)

It is completely normal to feel nervous about your first gynecologist appointment because you are discussing vulnerable and intimate topics. Do not be afraid to ask questions, express your discomfort, or if you have experienced any sexual trauma in the past, your provider is there to help make you feel as comfortable as they can for your first appointment. You also have the option of speaking with your provider alone or having your caregiver in the room with you, whichever is your preference.

I would refer to a gynecologist appointment in simpler terms as a women’s wellness exam. So think of it as just a physical for your genitals (and in some instances breast exams are also carried out depending on your physician). As previously stated, it is recommended by healthcare experts that you should be seeing a gyno at the ages of 13-15 to establish a relationship. Before or sometime during your appointment your provider will discuss your medical history with you which includes your sexual activity and history. It is important to be honest with your provider so they can address or attend to any concerns.

Internal pelvic exams are not administered unless you are sexually active or need to address a specific health concern. With pelvic exams, there will be instruments, a speculum, used to widen your vagina and allow for better examination of your vulva and cervix. It may cause some discomfort but not usually pain so if you are experiencing any of the two, let your provider know if you need to stop or take a moment. By the age of 21, you will be required to get a pap smear annually. A pap smear is administered with a speculum, then a brush is used to scrape cells of the cervix to test for cancer or any other diseases.

(TW: trauma) If you have trauma history and would want to ease your discomfort as much as possible during your OBGYN visit, please know that you have control over your visit and you have the right to stop your exam at any time. Your gynecologist may also inform you of every step of the appointment and exam, and you are allowed to bring a family member or friend or request extra staff to accompany you. You may also request the visit to be broken down into multiple shorter visits to familiarize yourself more with your provider.

For your appointment, dress comfortably and shower as usual. Don’t worry about shaving, grooming, or anything else about your appearance. Your gynecologist is not there to judge and it will not get in the way of the appointment. You also don’t have to worry if you are on your period, though it is recommended to not use tampons and instead pads for the appointment if you are expecting to do an exam. It is not recommended to douche, have sex, or use harsh cleaners a day before the visit.

Your gynecologist can also provide you with knowledge about topics surrounding overall genital health, body mass index, emotional health, reproductive system, menstrual health, pregnancy, and contraception. You are not limited to scheduling a gynecologist appointment just for a pelvic exam, you can have consultation appointments for any topics that were previously mentioned. In fact, consultations are a great way to be more educated about your overall health.

When it comes to picking a doctor, think about any preferences you might have that would make you feel more comfortable at your visits. Are you more comfortable with a male or female physician? Would you rather have a younger or older physician? As a survivor, what would make you feel more comfortable and safe? These are just a few of the preferences, it will inevitably vary from person to person. However, don’t be discouraged if you find yourself going from physician to physician, because what matters most is your comfortability. If you have health insurance, your insurance can provide you with a list of physicians as well as provide you with a referral. Planned parenthood is also a great healthcare provider whether you may or may not have health insurance or healthcare access.

I hope you find this guide to be resourceful! We would also like to clarify that we are not experts on this topic. If you would like to learn more, feel free to schedule a consultation with a provider!


Helpful links!

  • When should I start going to the OBGYN?

    • Ages 13-15

      • Initial appointment is to establish relationship with doctor

  • What should I expect at my first appointment?

    • Internal pelvic exam not necessary unless to address specific concern like STI/STD

    • Pap smear at 21, whether you are sexually active or not

    • Can speak with doctor alone for privacy or with parents, depending on preference

  • Other topics to ask your OBGYN ○ Genital health

    • BMI

    • emotional/social health

    • Any concerns about reproductive system/menstrual health

    • Pregnancy

    • Contraception

  • How to pick doctor

    • Planned Parenthood

      • For people without insurance or healthcare access

    • Think about preferences

      • A female doctor?

    • Don’t be discouraged if the first time wasn’t as expected

      • Finding a doctor right for you can be trial and error

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